oh posh. I need a real boy. To fill my void. This guy has potential. He is a Republican.
***** and i were talking about Republicans today. They are usually the champs of mediocrity but we decided mediocrity is underrated.
There is an asian family here, I heard the mom call her son onyong
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
What's the appropriateness of putting a 50 cent lyric in my gmas eulogy?
hey im home...im not sure how this mcdonalds got here but whatever im gonna eat it anyway.
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
At what point in your drunken state would you actually believe that the cops wanted to party with you?
Thanks for putting pants on me last night. And for calling me a princess.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
Locals got pissed I was talking to the barmaid. Tried to tell me that they keep all the good beer at "a Soho walkup" Google saved me
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
And since we used to fuck you are absolutely obligated to like my tweets
so the casino kicked my ass last night, i'm pretty sure i hit a new level of hungover....just showered with my sunglasses on because the bathroom light is too bright
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