I think we should see other people.
Already working on it.
ok so hold on... from what i hear... thank you... i'm sorry... and your welcome.
I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
I'm just planning on experiencing Disney as adult style as it gets. Drinking bloody mary's at dawn and telling all the kids waiting in lines how badly their future sucks and that Santa isn't real.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
New year means new boundaries for the Brazilian lady.. I'm pretty sure I got wax on my asshole
Apparently I was proudly showing him the cup I barfed pizza rolls into
Get the fuck back here. Your brother taped bottle rockets to the front of his scooter and is bombing around screaming, "Rest in peace, Goose!"
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
That pizza at 1 am literally tasted like I was eating an angel
someone in the elevator just told me i looked like a struggle but i smell very pretty..
Let's knock shit down like godzilla and have intense sex in the rubble
I'm high. ignore me
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
Randomize
