Ugh I just know that when I take off his pants his underwear will have Megan's Law written all over them.
Update: no underwear. Greeeeen light.
Ed hardy stationary at walmart. I'm betting snookie wishes she knew how to write
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
he woke up with $200 in his pocket and had to buy his cell phone back from a hobo at the bus stop.
He says I tipped the waitress ten dollars because she "smelled like pigs in a blanket."
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
Just explain how I got from the bar to a house I've never been in, waking up to a cop in uniform ripping a bong
I think, at this point, getting pissed and declaring my love via reality TV would be an improvement
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Liquor has joined the party. Aly just fucking yelled "I LOVE COOKING" and poured margarita mixer, ice and tequila into the blender.
This ice cream is 10x better than the sex I had yesterday
Speaking of dignity, who all saw me....
Randomize
