using no condom is gross. my vagina has a dress code.
In hindsight, i should have predicted that a drink called the 'rocky mountain bear fucker' would not end in a pleasant experience
I am one bad relationship away from having 30 cats.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
She just kept tellin me God was coming back and he was leavin her with a bag of stale doritoes and shitty friends.
Admitting I go to nursing school is my subtle way of saying, yes, I know every muscle in your penis and how to effectively use them.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
I'm sure there are thousands getting dick today in the name of independence
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
I tried to breakup with him by telling I had a threesome. He one upped me by saying he had a 5-some so I couldn’t do it.
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