The best feeling....farting and having the bubble hit your balls
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
i no longer even have beer goggles. i'm pretty sure i blacked out and had beer lasik.
i just opened the overnight bag i packed at 2am last night. Apparently all i thought id need was a handful of quarters, mascara and one sock
Jerry just sent me this: IOR GHIT ALL THE BUTTIB. Go get him. Now.
Just sit in your kitchen floor until something speaks to you.
Quick question: how long can sperm live in a rug?
You texted me "Americans are sad" and "chicken coop disaster" without any further explanation.
I just used cruise control in a 25 zone. When will this hangover end???
I told my dad my stomach hurt and he bet me ten bucks I couldn't throw up on command. He has no idea what I did last night and I got ten bucks.
Dude I'm riding a fucking tortoise this is awesome you should come with me more often
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Is she okay?
She may want to issue revenge punches, but medically fine.
This is the third time this year I've whored myself for a Netflix login. If this guy changes his password, I'm gonna fucking give up.
Or maybe pay for Netflix?
I'm not that desperate yet.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
