Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
Grape juice and vodka is NOT wine.
Well, think of it this way, if this were 200 years ago your father would have received the most goats in all the village for your fertile loins. Think about that.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
I don't know what you're talking about. I just drank beer out of my own bellybutton by doing a backbend and letting it run down my body.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
Yeah dude. Pulled out the couch and a bird flew at me. Please tell me who put a bird in my house.
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
I'm so high. Midnight pancake breakfast in bed
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
Randomize
