How was Slumdog? Did it pull your heartstrings?
It was entertaining. Better than most other Mexican films.
the stripper made me go home becuz she had to take her kid to a birthday party in the morning
Saw a guy smoking a cig holding it with a fork and driving WTF?
when she was cumming she looked like terri schiavo. it took all of my memorized porn images to not go limp.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
i'm sitting in the second floor bathroom drinking coronas in the shower. do not find me.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
Dude you ate toast sprawled out on my kitchen floor and said "this is comfy". No more day drinking.
tried to out drink an american air force weapons loader. never again
Ive fucked up. im like a feral dog rabidly chasing an infrequent dream amidst a cataclysm of disaster
who are you talking about my vagina to?!
Since moving to the suburbs, all I do is fuck my ex and watch cartoons. It's not so bad.
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
only 3 drinks in and he showed me his fursuit, please come pick me up
Randomize