I drank too much. My snot smells like vodka when I blow my nose.
I puked for half an hour, but I went and danced afterwards, and that made me feel better.
You are so irish.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
You don't put off sexcapades. Life lesson #1.
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
There was a huge crash. I came out of my room to find you sprawled out at the bottom of the stairs in your bra and panties. You looked at me, yelled 'WHAT AM I DOING WITH MY LIFE' and then ran back into his room.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I apparently pulled his dick out at the bar and started yelling "DICK PICS IN REAL LIFE!"
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
Theres just something about today that says lets get drunk, dont you think?
My liver is going to reject life during Greek Week
How many liver transplants can a person have? Bc you may need a couple
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
He said he’s shouting let’s get this bread the first time we have sex...
He’s very straightforward
Jack and I got in a huge fight at 6am. He fell asleep when I was giving him head so I freaked. We were both black out so I made a memo in my phone reminding me
Randomize