Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
mustard is like jesus in yellow tights
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
i literally would have sex with every single person on this girls wall, but not her
There are going to be so many Snookis this Halloween that I might just dress as the guy that hit her and punch them all in the face
What time did you start drinking?
Maybe.
Maybe isn't a time...
thats why a responsible adult always keeps some facial hair just in case they need to shave a hulk hogan mustache for midget wrestling...
Well once I told her I had a girlfriend she actually got more aggressive. Then Danielle called me and she saw the pic of the two of us on my phone and immediately said "can my caller I'd pic be me sitting on your face" wtf?
Just so you know the unusual amount of skittles on your floor is entirely your own fault. You bought me 20 bags of them while I was high.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
Fuck you guys, I'm trying to nurse my hangover and eat my chicken tenders in peace.
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
She woke up, peed in the sink and then passed out again, it's only 2 in the afternoon
Randomize
