Ya! She had a north face on tho so she was a classy hooker.
RIP Summer 2010. God knows it had to be one of us..
The grocery store is a combo of ghetto ppl complaining that the low fat chips are all that's left and hipsters trying to eat organic during the hurricane
Agreed. That's like a marriage. For better or worse, till death do us part. I will hold your head over a toilet
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
$645 later, she's throwing up in my washroom and asking for a cab. Hooker are soooo much cheaper.
him being a republican bothers me way more than his coke problem.
You had your shirt off checking IDs at the door and you don't even work there
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
He crawled outside into the bushes to throw up. He's just laying there now but he says he'll be ready to come home if we just give him five
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
See, remember when you wanted to get an Ashley Madison account and I told you not to and you hated me? You. Are. Welcome.
Give it up bro. I’m not wearing pants or a bra and only an act of god could change that
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
