u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
you were trying to give my penis an indian burn.
What's your middle initial? I need it for the census. I put us down as "unmarried partners."
Oh my god... you're gay. Ps, its A.
No no. According to the 2010 US Census, we're gay.
four guys that i have slept with have come into my job today. FOUR. i feel like it's like bring your sex partners to work day.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
who's job is it to make sure we don't run out of tp since the incident of 09'... Thats right you go get some
Last night you told me you "were too high" and didn't deserve a hashbrown.
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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