that was after robitussin, alcohol, and chocolate sauce... but before we finished pregaming
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
I have a dream, to one day wake up next to a girl, walk to the washroom and kick her kids toys out of the way. That day has come, yes we can.
Just asked what her favorite part of a guys body is. She said ballsack. I'm in love.
Martha Stewart would most definitely roll a great joint.
My dick just stopped my iPhone from falling into the toilet.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
He gave me such a powerful orgasm I blurted out I love you. This is why just rebouding out of a serouis relationship is awkward.
She just laid there, sucking on a piece of steak, with the most content look on her face. Just before she passed out (steak still on her mouth) she said the cat box needed to be emptied
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
sea world and a strip club? BEST DAY EVER!
My yoga ball is now going to be used for actual exercise instead of somewhere to suction cup a dildo
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