Duck Duck Cougar?
We better get laid next semester cause I prayed hard
I even walked 30 feet with my eyes closed from two love rocks so that we get some cock
We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I've created a drink called, "watching the sound of music with grandma." its straight vodka
Bathrooms are cool, I think Im just gonna hang out here for a bit.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
He's like the unplanned child of drunkenness
So i am officially handcuffed to the pole on the party bus while taking jello shots.....this shall be an interesting night
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
Randomize
