Stephanie. Problem. I think if I had met Murphy before Ben I would have fucked him instead.
Don't worry about your Murphy feelings. I may have fucked him no matter what.
smell my finger.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
He insisted on sleeping in my bed. Had he taken all of my obvious hints I would have sucked his dick. He only wanted to snuggle. My world has been turned upside down.
I can already see the regret in her eyes. Amazing night. This city rules.
So I'm at that stage in my life where I am stalking my stalker just to get laid
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
Just beer bonged tequila, broke into the hotel next door and got chased by security. It's spring break
Your dog took my vibrator out to the yard
I saw your dick pic and thought there goes the last thread of my heterosexuality.
your were asleep with people making out on top of you. you didn't even look bothered by it.
he took my bra off with his teeth, THEN decided he just wanted to make out and cuddle. i don't know what the female version of blue balls is, but i've been living with it since 1 a.m.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
