i need a shirt that says "I fuck trainwrecks"
So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
who the fuck is that kid sitting with you...
I don't have any fucking idea. I woke up and he was there. I'm kinda creeped out.
Nobody is wearing shirts anymore. What is happening.
I've been drunk so often this summer being sober is exciting
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
What would you do in exchange for having a girl eat a waffle house waffle off your body?
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
There is a stockpile of mangos and vodka in my backyard and I'm at least 90% sure you had something to do with it.
So my mom wants to hear about my weekend. How do I make licking cupcake frosting off your face while high not sound like just that?
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