is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
How do you get a black eye playing beer pong??
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
I didnt finish. My brain kept playing the duck tales theme thru the entire blow job
Got done with class, now I'm buying MD 2020 with the ex. Sure feels like college.
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I ordered more beers for everyone but had to finish them all. I promptly went outside and projectile vomited in the street. Three times.
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I've only fucked to 2 Fleetwood Mac songs, that must be why my life feels so empty.
I AM STRANGELY AROUSED BY THIS UNEXPECTED DEVELOPMENT AND I AM COMPLETELY OK WITH THIS.
Shit. My boss is having me meet and greet with the new doc upstairs. Do you think his doctor powers will detect that I'm still high?
I just wanna fuck your brother. Sorry if thats a crime.
I offered to go down on her because of how impressive her theatre career was. Stop letting me talk to lesbians.
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