So I just went home and made my own spanx by cutting the legs off of a pair of nylons. I'm either a genius or missed my calling to live in a trailer park.
I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
I told him that all frat guys do it... it was that easy to get him to go down on me.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
This is even worse then that time I fucked a guy just because he had air conditioning.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
Turns out the guy I peed on gave me a ride back to my dorm this morning.
You are a god.
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I just remember yelling "BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS BODY SHOTS" while I was streaking
Sooo a reasonable response to someone eating my lunch is to set the place on fire right?
And he's a cuddle champ. I know because I slept over because I don't know what boundaries are.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
Randomize
