drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
please quote me on this- the only thing worse than being ugly is being ugly and thinking that you're pretty
I just made out with a girl with a life jacket on wtf is going on
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
Throwing up while listening to pandora radio. Don't tell me my life doesn't have theme music.
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
At least it earned you a couple drinks. And something tells me you've touched grosser things with less incentive.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
KEG. KEG. THE OPERA HAS A KEG. KEG STAND IN A TUX. AFTER PARTY RAVE AND KEG STANDS.
Well we get the HIV results on my birthday haha. It'll be like happy birthday kid, you have AIDS.
I fully committed to my astronaut costume, to say the least. blacking out on moonshine and having a moonwalk of shame this morning: happy Halloweekend.
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
What's the polite way to say "hey I don't actually want to fuck you, I just swiped right on you because you didn't like me in high school and I needed validation"
Randomize
