you know he's having a sex change. I can't believe you called him "titty man" to his face....
I'm not sure if doing him was such a good idea. Yes the sex was good, but I'm scared I set myself up for failure in 2011 because he's the hottest guy. Ever.
handjobs have no place on a baseball diamond
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
We left live chickens on the basement slip n slide. Good luck finding your car keys
Had to crawl to the kitchen this morning cuz I was too hung over but really wanted fruity pebbles. yes. I ate fruity pebbles on the kitchen floor.
her dad gauges his nipple piercings.
I want to buy her liposuction. And a spot on What Not To Wear. And a face transplant.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
You invented a drink at the bar and named it Boner Soup. It was like an even trashier version of a long island iced tea
You started having a threesome right in front of me.
lololol that's what happened?
Stephanie looked me right in the eye while she was going down on you. It made me really uncomfortable.
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
Randomize
