Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
It's sad that I have started checking out the ring finger before the rack...I'm getting old
So this snow storm is NOT helpin my masturbation problem
She was kinda tragic... like a puppy that runs into things. Cute but really stupid. So, yeah, I hit it.
We had to go visit his dealer in the hospital to buy some weed.
Drunk
Deyhxbr
Fucaerrrrr
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
as soon as I stop standing here with one leg up on my bathroom counter admiring my balls, I'm going to go tan. and then you may come over.
you were making out with a guy that looked like Fat Albert, I kicked you in the vagina but you didn't stop
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Sorry was covered in semen when you texted me. Just walking back from the Harvard Club
All you needed to say was one of those sentences and the other would've been implied.
Per my usual Thursday, I blacked out and slept on the stairs.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I swear 2020 just keeps getting worse and worse
Randomize
