whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
Either he has two lazy eyes or he really likes my tits..
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I want to frame my negative pregnancy test.
imagine how many guys you'd have sex if you didn't recieve your monthly gift.
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
You picked me up and threw me on a barstool and shoved shots in front of me.
Thats like the definition of a good friend
I left you pizza on the porch. I didn't want to wake you, if you were passed out on the bathroom floor again. Sorry if it's cold.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
you're right. i am beautiful. like a May day. frolicking in a meadow of wildflowers. platinum in one hand. pipe in the other. that kind of beautiful.
hes fine. but he did fall asleep while tebowing and started snoring
Hold on... Are we having an intellectual conversation about porn?
Yup
I love us.
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
guess who got crunk and thought it would be a good idea to give herself a pixie cut?
THOUGHT
Randomize