Actions speak louder than words. Her actions scream crazy.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
so hey instead of everyone buying me a birthday present can everyone just pitch in for my abortion?
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
what is with people arguing over soda or pop? to be honest i thought it was just called chaser
today's the one month anniversary of me not giving anyone head. can you tell me you're proud
it's sad that this is a milestone
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
Just for future questioning, I didnt break up with you over text
His roommate left already and took the beer pong table so we had to take off his bedroom door. Maybe res life won't notice.
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
So she was on top of my phone and somehow called my roommate while I banged her. I picked up and he congratulated me. I was with his sister. I will take this to my grave.
Can we skype so I'm not drinking alone?
Randomize
