I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
you are the sluttiest virgin ive ever met
thanks it was an honor just to be nominated
Just took my pill on time for two days in a row. I deserve a prize.
Not having phil's child is good enough.
could you please not use my mortar and pestal for its intended purpose? i just snorted cracked black pepper.
Fuck morning classes and our weekday drinking habits.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
Our penis' have led to more networking than mark zuckerberg.
My liver was like a college freshman on spring break. It would've danced topless on tables if it could have.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
Hey, it's not my fault that you had a shitty bed frame that couldn't handle the rough sex you're into.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
Why are we so out going and care free I can't wait for maturity to kick in so we stop having 700 dollar bar tabs
Randomize
