Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
Dude, you need to talk to your mom
wtf?
She just called and asked if i would be part of the intervention she's planning for you
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
He got so drunk that he tried hitting on a girl using nothing but his Samuel L. Jackson soundboard application on his Iphone
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
She is putting glow sticks from her bedroom to the bathroom. She is calling it 'Being prepared'. God help us all tonight...
Our whole friendship has just been time foreshadowing my dick in your mouth.
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
Serious question: Should I volunteer to get tazered? My instincts say no but my wild side says yes.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
Nothing like coaching 5 year olds with a bunch of visible bruises from last night's drunk bondage sex.
Got my parents to pick me up from the party, take me to the bar and buy all my drinks, then drop me off at my booty calls house.
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
I will not go because I am a man of my word and of my penis.
I went to a swingers party and came home with a boyfriend. I love my life.
Randomize
