This girl is more easily done than said...
hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
my entire walk over here no one looked in my eyes. Period Boobs are BAACKKK.
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
Sorry for trying to give you my dresser last night. Are any of the drawers still in your car?
i'm too drunk to leave my room. poked my head out like a turtle and everyone knew i wasn't sober. i like it better in my nonjudgmental turtle shell anyway.
Trick or treaters just rang our doorbell
Give them the moldy beer cans, we need to get rid of those
I just want to fuck you then discuss implications of our existence afterwards. Then Doritos and hot tub.
ARE YOU SAYING THAT YOU DON'T WANT TO GO TO A PARTY AT AN ADULT STORE WHERE A BUNCH OF HOT GIRLS ARE DRINKING
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
We were simultaneously boning chicks 3 feet away from each other. Do you realize how much that upped our 15 year friendship?
It took me half an hour to realize I didnt know them
I got stoned and explored ice caves with a guy who photographs dildos for a living. I win.
Took pain meds with RumChata this morning. It's like morning milk but better
You just sent me an audio message of you peeing. That’s true love right there.
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