I have to look really hot tonight because my personality is going to suck.
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
She has an album entitled "my photography", which consists of about 80 different pictures of a tractor that she took on her cell phone. I'm all for freedom of expression, but come on.
His ankle bracelet only gets in the way when I'm trying to take off his pants.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
so high and i think i just ordered a magic bullet.
did you call within the first 18 minutes? can i have the free one?
There are topless girls riding the lawn flamingos. I win.
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
But in the grand scheme of things, "should i bang a hot roommate or a sexy giant" is really not a bad lot in life
I'm sorry I did drugs then got really loud and bitchy at your party and judged your choice in one night stands.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
My New Year's resolution is to chill out on the group sex. At least with my friends anyway.
Dude what happened last night?
I don't know, I'm still trying to figure out how I got my clothes back on.
Randomize
