that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
he has cookie breath... dont trust fat people.
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
i chipped my tooth tryin to cut thru her pantyhose. that stuff is bulletproof.
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Tequila is the liquid version of celery. I lose more calories during tequila drunk and the following sexual activities than I gain by drinking it...
Since when does sleeping with your RA not result in free meal swipes? I feel so tricked...
Do you think that we can get a group discount on liver transplants? We'll be like kids again!
I feel like this has turned into my work. But if I get paid sitting under a desk, that's perfectly fine with me.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
He was trying to talk to me about standards while he had a french fry box on his hand like a glove and was using it to flatten his cheeseburger.
Nobody wants to date "Eats Taco Bell Secretly In Her Car" Girl
You've had it in your mouth, how have you not seen it?
It’s a hundred kinds of wrong to do Jell-O shots at home alone. Right?
I support drinking alone. But Jell-O shots. That’s a game changer.
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