We even fucked WHILE he was making me breakfast in bed.
I think we should involve a squid next time we fuck.
u kno there is a reason i dont tell mi friends about u
is it bad if my mug shot looks better than my profile picture?
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Keeping my bail papers as a souvenir from when I was arrested. Too weird?
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
You know what id love more than anything right now? ..a back rub while eating biscuits and gravy
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
Only I could turn my one night stands into class essays. Go me.
Because of you I'm damaged goods. I'm a fucking soup can and you dropped me.
you were so high you just watched the elf.... its spring
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
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