I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
she looked like the before picture.
Then I received a text in French, that roughly translated to "all you'll ever be good for is sex on the Internet"
This hotel is not contributing to my sobriety, they have 4 kinds of free wine and beer.
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
Going out so taking the 2nd 1/2 of beer w/ me ont'tube in a Pringles tube. I give money to people on the street that have more self respect.
I just put on eyeliner and a diff shirt in case the pizza guy is cute. This is what my dating life has come to
yeah but think of how much more hungover we'd be if we didn't steal those cookies
my vagradar is going off.. it smells a soldier
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
Yup he definitely fell asleep. I'm trying to bone an old man
Felt so good this afternoon, figured I wouldn't have a comedown. Wrong. Just realized I've been staring at a wall for 40 minutes contemplating the color yellow.
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
