brad dismisses pussy with prejudice
I start off june hungover/still drunk stumbling down my driveway with the trashcan at 6am..it's gonna be an interesting month
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
are you serious? he told me he had to cancel bc his grandma came into town
well unless his grandma is 21 and blonde, HE LIED TO YOU IDIOT
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
It's almost summer. We need to start reconnecting with our home drug dealers.
Pissed along side the highway while waving at all the traffic... if thats not a sign of a productive night to come then idk what is
Im in mikes bed telling my vagina I'm sorry in advance.
Just rinsed and put my styrofoam cup of noodles in the dishwasher. I need to be not hungover ASAP
It was easier that asking where the vagina platter is.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
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