her vagine was all disorganized.
this guy jus got head in a gas station bathroom from this fat chick with one leg
gross dude. was the guy blacked out drunk or something?
yeah and it only cost me 6 dollars
we screwed to my bar mtzvah tape, I became a man while watching myself becom a man
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
4 to the list in one week. Slutsville isn't as fun as the brochure promised.
You know what's soul crushing? Walking to subway and find out you were too drunk to put on shoes and being denied service.
Um. I literally have no words.
omg. MEgabus. stoned.
Theres these two guys talking.
I'm sorry I peed on your everything.
Thanks for not locking your door. I had to pee and there was a random person throwing up in my bathroom so I used yours. \nPS I stole your soap
OMG. Dad just threw a 100 dollar bill down on the table for a girl to lift her shirt. I think he was kidding, but...
Fastest way to get judgmental looks on a Sunday morning: wear sunglasses inside carrying a case of beer and thin mints at the grocery store. May or may not have ran into the glass door.
Gotta love Minnesota
So I should just walk in, look him in the eye and say, "I just came to fuck your brother, nice to meet you" and just walk to your room.
I just hooked up with a one legged Australian guy. Hooray diversity!
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
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