I threw up under water while wearing a hockey helmet last night. Awesome.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
i'm drinking with a bunch of phds, i feel very stupid but good about my drinking abilities
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
For her birthday she wants to, " try something different with our butts a funnel and a bottle of whiskey"
I feel like an ass. I'm not blacking out ever again. I want to clean your feet for a year. Just like Jesus did.
I just ordered 30 klonopins from India that could probably be anything from Viagra to Midol. You need to find another friend to get advice from right now
Its was awkward last year cuz in the middle of it her mom bust In the room with noise makers and champagne
Last night she walked off and disappeared from everyone got home at 330 and said she went to the casino with her cab driver.
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
If I could drink as much and have the amount of sex he has at his age, well I'd probably be dead
I like to be the stable force in your otherwise chaotic existence.
still can't believe dude took a personal call while he was balls deep in my mouth.
Hey how're your balls?
Don't ever let me helicopter again.
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