GO HOME AND LIKE EVERYTHING ON COLT'S FACEBOOK UNTIL 2007.
Wtf it's a Friday night?
PRIORITIZE.
I feel like a combination of david goes to the dentist and drunkest guy ever goes for more beer
I'm at the bass pro shop. They have a river full of trout and turtles, a shooting range, a full bar, and the patriots cheerleaders are here. I now understand why people are rednecks. I may never leave
It took my four years to get this degree, and 4 hours to lose it, My parents are not impressed.
These eggs taste like chocolate chip cookies. This is the best hangover ever.
is he the 3rd person to bang everyone in our group?
I should have taken pre-gaming this lunch date more seriously.
She just admitted to me that she was a pinecone.
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
I sent him a bunch of texts telling him that his beard wasn't long enough yet so we couldn't fuck and to text me back in a few hours if it had.
its ok, the prom king gave me his crown to puke in
I can feel my pain tolerance has shot up right along with my libido
Her ass is the reason I still believe in a higher power
im gonna miss him. and by him, i mean his dick
Well it was okay until he pinned my arms over my head and I found the loaded pistol tucked behind the bed... THIS IS WHY WE DON'T FUCK BOYS IN MONTANA ANYMORE
Randomize
