I like you better when you drink
I like you better when I drink too
She pulled a cheeseburger out of her purse. I have missed her so much.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
I added "don't hook up with boys with girlfriends" to my new years resolution and realized how sad it was that it made me actually feel like a better person
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Called Jeff last night and told him I wanted to have sex in the airport terminal. Blackout Brooke definitely came out last night.
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
I'm convinced that college is the only place where one can have an existential crisis over what sweatpants to wear
So I ripped my crotchless fishnet body suit when my drunk ass tried to crawl through the crotch to put it on.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
I'm starting to think my emotional health is declining because I was watching transformers today and legit almost started crying
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
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