I've decided through careful research we can out drink any country folk.
I feel like my nuva ring should have a vibrating switch.
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Absolute soulmates or functional alcoholics?
Can't be the first without the last
My adult sexuality and some of the best memories of my childhood collided like a Pee Wee Herman wet dream.
Elaborate
Strip Mario-Kart
Haha yeah my head's fine..sorry about the dent in your fridge.
Oh my god i hate key west. No one takes amex and strippers took all my money
Just fat and dog and sweat all over the bed. All night long.
someday i'll meet a man and who loves me as much as i love getting drunk and starting fires
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
We need to feng shui this bitch.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
Randomize
