a guy named alex was hitting on my friend tonight. he doesnt work on wind turbines tho.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
This boy just came into class wearing sperrys and a polo but also carrying a longboard. I'm unequivocably attracted to his level of doucheyness.
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
He told me his condom was going to expire tomorrow and he needed to use it. I can't believe I fell for it.
kicked my backpack and turned on my vibrator in the middle of class. success.
he had his head down and said he was listening for the buffalo, he had to still be drunk.
The amount of precision it takes to urinate into a 2 liter bottle while hammered is undeniably difficult.
Code 10 We gotta leave. Now. I took a dump in the upstairs toilet and its clogged and overflowing, and believe me I don't want to have to explain myself to this frat on parents weekend.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I was going down on her and she started whistling "Whistle while you work." I'm in love.
apparently when we were gone the parents play strip connect 4
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Just found out the last guy I hooked up with is being held in a federal prison under suspicion of stealing 175k.
YOU UNCULTURED BADGER
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