Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
I wish they made helmets for livers.
my dentist asked me why my tooth was chipped, i told him i couldn't remember. i think he understands.
You were on the drunk bus swinging around on the pole when you decided you were hungry, so you pulled half a bagel out of your pants and ate it. Everyone stared at you, dumbfounded as to where it came from, and cheered
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
He's a forty-something balding gay man with no boundaries or sense of social norms. Of course we should befriend him.
I just wanna be like "dude your gf's on a porn site" but i just dont know if i have the heart.
new costume idea. paint swatches and a ball gag... I'll be 50 shades of grey.
Dude, on the way home the cab driver asked why you didn't bring a guy home and referred to you as "one night stand girl"
I got drunk and slept with the guy who looks like Jesus.
Typical.
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
Accomplishment of the day: changing my tampon at 38,000 ft with turbulence. Fasten seatbelt sign was definitely on.
Just had an oven catch fire while I was balls deep. Fire department came, I did not.
You told me that you would let her eat cake off of your ass, then fell asleep on the floor
Randomize
