the last time I saw her she was leaving the mens bathroom and club rush with her dress inside out. typical tease.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
I just jerked it so loud the neighbor banged on their floor. maybe my wife got the point
I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Fuck winter. I had to scrape my windshield, shoeless, after the walk of shame so I could go home.
you called her butter tits and then threw up in your cup. i dont know if theres any way to come back from that
as of this morning I have officially vommed on the highways of 6 different countries. It's a proud moment.
Go forth Daniel, drink, be merry... And meet some hot Asians for your friends to bang
hey now, it was 6 bucks for 5 shots. you would have lost your panties too.
If TJ is short for Trader Joe, I'm gonna fuck him
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
oh i see... well this is a positive first step in you courting him for sex.
I think I gotta smoke less weed, I'm getting to lazy to fuck my girlfriend
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
