i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
Tickle wars 95% of the time end in sex.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
He was about to puke, and so I handed him an empty beer can. In retrospect, not very helpful.
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
By the way I got my period today. No NHL babies for me.
if i had known the extra weight would have gone to my tits, i would have started drinking years ago
There is a check pinned to the wall at Connor's. It's a check I wrote for $1,000,000... To you. Clearly you made out well on St. Patrick's day. Thanks for being too shitfaced to remember to grab that.
I'm so high. I'm going to need directions to get home.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize