The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
Please come to History lecture. The kid two seats over is belligerently drunk.
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
It took him three days to realize his roommate had moved out.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
Sent him a picture of my pregnant boobs from last year, think he'll notice the difference?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Every time I someone I meet again from that wedding it turns into the "Oh your the guy who puked in the hallway and passed out in front of the elevator."
Dude, why did I wake up with ketchup packets in my bed and the stove in my room??
Me and some girl at the bar just high fived for not wearing bras
Your vagina felt like having sex with thanksgiving mashed potatoes. The best kind of mashed potatoes
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
Do you remember telling those ppl that they need to mate and give you the baby and in 15 years you will all reunite and it will be a party?
Randomize
