But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
You look just like Jennifer Aniston on food.
we found you eating frozen orange juice with a spoon and then drinking vodka from the bottle.
just got off the metro to throw up and got back on like it ain't no thang
really making moves this morning i see
Woke up un the hot tuv. Climbed out fo the hot tub and fell asleeo. Woke ip again in the hot tub.
4 months of living in europe has taught me the art of making a drunken stumble look like a dance move
I love my boobs, they're the only thing that supports me. They make me a solid 6.
If I EVER wake up with two black eyes again you better come up with a better story than trying to see how many punches I could take.
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
Still breathing?
Still breathing , but quite out of it. I think I hallucinated like 20 action sequences.
What.
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I don't want to just break his heart, I want to dip it in liquid nitrogen and then smash it until it's powder and snort the powder
My first love was gay too, it's okay.
She shaved her vagina in my bed. Good night
My new roommate looks like a troll. Or a serial killer. So if I disappear, show this text to the cops.
Randomize
