Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
dont get me wrong, i like when a guy is into my boobs but when he started saying mama i want milk let me suck, i gathered my shit together and bounced.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
The bouncer yelled at him for poking at the guy selling roses, I think it's time to leave.
She is banging on the liquor store door begging them to let her come in.
after tonight, seriously nothing could taste better than toothpaste
I have whiskey and jager. There's no telling what kind of monster will emerge
Hey remember that time you called a woman a "man in a dress" and then threw up in a drinking fountain?
This Christmas I would like to thank Jesus for cocaine.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
And for some reason every time I get drunk I just want to tell you that I have a mini secret personal fan club of your dick
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
who knew being a fake dominatrix could be so fun?
Randomize
