Dude that chick in the corner just threw up
Hot
You know, if there were no such thing as marriage, i don't think porn would exist.
Fuck appropriateness.
I learned to sign I want to be on you today
Score
Deaf chicks here I come
bringing a ziploc bag full of Jim Beam to the movies may not have been the best idea.
Finished watching the entire first season of mighty morphing power rangers. Now I have nothing. Not even a life.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
That girl is nothing but trouble. She's 40% red hair and 60% daddy issues.
Also, in the middle of me riding him, he said "I want you to dance on my dick" like I was supposed to know what that means
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
That hot guy just got to class and he's eating a bagel sandwich. I dunno which I'm more attracted to
These past few weeks have been a lesson on why you don't put your penis inside girls who live in your building.
I woke up with broken tostitos all over my bed and a snap chat of myself flipping off the camera.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
Randomize
