She said her name was "party"
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
no. you can't hotbox the world.
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
how does Santa get into Hogwarts?
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
I just febrezed the jizz on my pants and wore them again, gross or eco-friendly?
Eco-friendly.
Judging by what's in the bathroom right now, I see you graced us with your presence last night.
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
That's saying a lot from the girl who takes her liquor with her to the library
Why don't we skip the roadtrip entirely, save us the trip, and go straight to jail?
he doesn't even text me anymore.. he just facebook chats me a shark emoticon which has turned into code for 'be naked at my house in 15 mins'
You gotta own your makeout pics Matt. They're like badges of honor
Sorry I peed on your ottoman
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
