hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
He finally told me that he's married. I guess it doesn't really matter.
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
She paints her nails the color of the sheets of the last guy she slept with
All she said to me last night is that when her eyes roll back, to release my choke hold.
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
Seriously. My vagina. Can we talk about it? It's gonna jump off this treadmill and devour my trainer.
Your mom won me $100 and you showed me your tits. Solid evening.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
he's singing something in russian and knocking over my plants with his dick, get his drunk ass out of my apartment
HE STUCK IT IN THE FISHBOWL WTF
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
So after the absinthe shots_____(fill in the blank area for me please)......
How was your day?
Peaceful. I left the house to get paid and get fried chicken.
Campus scavenger hunt! and by scavenger hunt I mean all the pharmacies are sold out of Plan B.
Randomize
