Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
im going to forcibly insert an angry corn snake into his urethra
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Weirdest conversation with my dad. He just told me he didn't shave his pubes.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
he told me he's been faithful to his girlfriend and is gonna try to stay that way. challenge accepted.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I love being Chipotle's first beer sale of the morning.
Just got complimented on my chugging... Car bombs show how good I am at swallowing, they should be my new pickup line.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
I GOT MY PERIOD THIS IS A GLORIOUS DAY I AM TOTALLY GOING TO MAKE PIES TO CELEBRATE THAT THERE ARE NO REPUBLICANS IN MY UTERUS!
Hey, I'm renting a storage locker for the summer to keep all my bondage shit in so my parents don't see it. You wanna split on it for your all your weed shit?
I wore a bathing suit downtown so I didn't have to put on underwear, I obviously don't have my shit together
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
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