You remember correctly you did get a golf cart ride out but it wasnt because you were special. You were so smashed you were screaming tiger at random golfers in the middle of there backswing.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
he must have thought the song was "ejacuate on the dance floor"
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
I just remembered that he had fake blood all over his face last night. I woke up with it all over my dick. He was 50. Please don't judge me.
I went out as a member of the house of Gryfindor and came home as Snooki
My birthday was already very memorable but her punching me in the face put it over the top. I love being 25 and still not giving a fuck.
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
I got with a bridesmaid and a server as well as put an $80 tab in rum and coke under the name Emerson Iglesias. Are you sure it wasn't my wedding?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
I just wiped my butthole and there was glitter down there.
U NO SLUT. YOUR HEART IS JUST FREE.
Randomize
