We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
As I was climbing out of the pool he slapped my ass and said 'stay golden', i don't know why but it felt right.
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
why the fuck are my pubes caked with bread crumbs?
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
High with mom again. She's giving me relationship advice.
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
He says he invented a new sex move called The Redbird that we can only do when I'm on my period. Should I be concerned?
I'm drinking your booze since you ate my pop-tarts. I'm telling you this because I still don't think it's a fair trade.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
I'm about to eat a honey mustard chicken salad on the toilet while I try to shit. You really think I care about what "kind of guy he is?" The fuck out of here.
If you don't care, I don't. Good luck finding prince charming.
You carved your initals into all my vitamins and said "now a small part of me will be in you every morning" before you fell asleep with my thong on your head.
I wish I was taller so I could give these boobs the publicity they deserve.
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