You know your life is awesome when sometimes you walk down the street eating a sandwich and you run into someone you had a threesome with. And not say hi.
i just walked into a room at this party and someone yelled "dibs!"...
my grandma just informed me that patrick swayze used to babysit my dads cousins why wasn't i informed of this early...like when i was obsessed with dirty dancing!
I'm pissed I'm finding this out at 24 bc i could have used this material to make friends
My little brother has some high school girls in my pool, it's like a jailbait buffet in my backyard
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
no memory loss, but i'm unhappy with my memories
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
No, I got those cupcakes fair and square. That homeless man should have known not to underestimate the determination of a stoned chem student.
We need to re-create the Get Some Ass Tour 2002.
Um, 2 out of 3 people involved with that particular event are now married, so I don't think that will be happening.
HELLO, they're MARRIED! They need to get some ass more than anyone.
stop calling me dude. finger blasting me officially kills you being able to call me dude.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
She has a bong hits for Jesus shirt. Of course I'm going to like her.
I'm just hitting the tip of the iceberg on accents for this trip...so basically my panties are done for.
I consider walking to the bars and dancing my exercise and I buy doubles so my drinks r heavier so that's my arm workout
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
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