Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
just saw your exgirlfriend at the mall. her sister is pretty hot.
called that a week into the relationship. like driving off the lot with a 2010 and seeing the 2011 models coming in on the truck.
Who faxed a picture of their penis to the office printer?!
I told him the truth. Truth leads to vodka. Vodka leads to tequila. Tequila leads to prison.
Well... first you killed the girls goldfish, then you shoved her face in your armpit, made her cry, got kicked out, ate your cigarettes, and passed out in her driveway. Pretty successful night if you ask me
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
I stuck my fake eyelashes to his balls after he passed out.
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
how should I feel if a guy kept complimenting my bangs while I was giving him a blowjob?
I'm not a whore anymore. I gave up 90% of my women for you. I'm a 4-5 woman kind of guy now.
I don't fucking know. He perched his parrot on his dick. I left after that.
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize
